Saying Yes To An Off-The-Rack Dress

My bridal party and I spent our entire Saturday hunting for the perfect dress, and I'm happy to say that I did finally find the one!

Wedding dress preferences differ from bride to bride, so my tips may not suit everyone. We are all very unique, with very different tastes and personalities. These are just a few of my realizations and personal recommendations to anyone who is interested in going the off-the-rack route.

Photo Source: www.ewedding.com

Don't panic. The day before I set an appointment with the bridal shop, I felt a little panicky just thinking about what I had to go through. Living in the Philippines, where I was so used to hiring a couturier to start from scratch and take every single detail into account -- from how the hemline to the tiniest bead matches exactly what I had pictured in my mind -- the world of off-the-rack, ready-made formal dresses was so new (and a bit scary) to me. I had to remind myself that the two bridal boutiques I chose have been doing bridal wear for many years, and that I had my family to help me every step of the way, making sure that I would end up choosing nothing less than my dream wedding dress. And yes, even if it is off-the-rack.

Don't try on every single dress you see. Make it a point to narrow down your preferences before visiting shops. I came in thirty minutes before my appointment to look through their catalogs, where I marked all the dresses I wanted to try on. That way, your dresser will know exactly what to pick, and all you have to do is try them on! If I could spare myself the trouble of having to go through every single rack, I would.

You're only wearing it once. Although I can be very specific and firm about what I want for a wedding dress, I also enjoy simplicity. I'm a very practical person. I know that this is going to be a once-in-a-lifetime, unforgettable experience, but it is also precisely because I am only wearing it once that I'm not going to spend a boatload of cash. Even if I had all the money in the world, which I don't, I still wouldn't spend $5,000 on a wedding dress. I wouldn't fuss over the name of the designer -- I tried on a Vera Wang dress and it paled in comparison to the nameless dress I ended up choosing. I see no reason to spend all that money on one dress that you're probably not going to wear ever again. I'd rather save it for something else, something that would last longer than five hours. Something like our future home, perhaps.

Don't be afraid to say "Yes" too soon. I ended up saying yes to the third dress I tried on the day. Is that too soon? To me, there is no such thing as saying yes to the dress too soon, as long as you know that you are not settling, which brings me to my next tip...

Don't settle. I have to admit, I have a tendency to have the whatever attitude when it comes to making myself look glamorous. Like I said, I hate shopping for clothes, because I find it extremely tedious. I'm glad that my mom and one of my bridesmaids (and future sister-in-law) were there to remind me how important that day was. Every time I chose a dress that seemed okay-enough, my mom would give me her look of disapproval that always scared me as a child. My bridesmaid, Amy, spent literally the entire day looking through every store for the perfect bridesmaid dress, reminding me how this day is no ordinary shopping day. You are, after all, shopping for your wedding!

Enjoy every moment! This is a special day for you, so don't waste it on being a stressed out, evil bridezilla. Sometimes, it is easier said than done, but you are going to spend that day with the women in your life who have always been there and will continue to be there for you as you step into a brand new and exciting chapter. Be nice to your bridesmaids. Listen to your mom. Get to know your future mother-in-law. Cherish every moment, because this is a happy day. And it's always fun keeping a big secret from your future hubby until the big day!

Why Getting A Beagle Is Enough For Now

It's really important to know exactly what you and your soon-to-be-spouse expect during the first few years of married life. Some couples want kids right away. Some don't want any children at all, and would rather grow old, like so...

My fiance and I are somewhere in the middle of that. We do want a family. We want to have children, pets, the whole deal. But what we really want, for now, is a beagle named Science.

That's it.

I know a lot of couples who are doing, or have done, the same thing, and they all have different reasons for choosing to wait. Chris and I want to wait for at least a couple of years before treading the strange path of parenthood, because right now, we're feeling both selfish and unselfish about a few things.

We feel selfish over each other. We want it to be just the two of us for at least a couple of years before a new person, i.e. our child, decides to barge in. We want the house and bed to ourselves. We want to buy things for ourselves without having to worry about how this amount of money should go to diapers or milk. We want to travel - a lot - and we want to do it on our own.

At the same time, whenever we put on our mom and dad caps, we start feeling unselfish. We know we're just not ready yet, financially, emotionally, even physically - 'healthy lifestyle' isn't exactly part of our recently updated dictionary, where 'wet fries' was recently added as the newest term. Having kids is serious business, and we both want to be ready for it, so that our children will have the best life possible. That is our goal, and that is something we both know we aren't quite equipped to fulfill just yet.

More than anything, we just want to continue getting to know each other in such a different way from how we got to know each other while dating. We never lived together, so it will be interesting seeing each other literally every single day for the first time in our relationship. We know some of our quirks, but not all of them, and we'll experience them for sure when we start living under one roof. And quite frankly, I prefer to know about these things in the middle of watching Firefly reruns, not while I'm breast feeding.

So that is why, for now, we visit animal shelters instead of going through baby magazines. We purchase Halloween costumes for dogs, and onesies for our friends' babies. Although one really can't tell for sure when you're meant to have a baby, what we are sure of now are our current priorities. When the baby comes, I'm sure the wait will be worth it, and everything will fall into place.